Blogging The Friendship Factor. Conclusion

Reading this book (Amazon link) has been a very convicting experience.

And I have enjoyed it very much.

This last post is a summary of things that I have learned.

John 15:13 (NASB) “Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends.”

First, being a friend means a laying down of myself in specific, concrete ways:
• a willingness to listen (and to be silent)
• to make eye contact (this is difficult for me)
• a willingness to spend my time with others (rather than on myself)
• a willingness to talk about emotions (never easy in a guy)

I John 1:9 (NASB) “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”

James 5:16a (NASB) “Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another, so that you may be healed.”

Second, being a friend means a willingness to be vulnerable, and to face the fear of rejection:
• facing our “shadow side,” our fallen human nature and being transparent with one another
• in appropriate setting and with appropriate people, confessing our sins.
• “sharing deeply of hurts, joys, sins, and excesses.” page 37

I Peter 1:22 (NASB) “Since you have in obedience to the truth purified your souls for a sincere love (affection or fondness) of the brethren, fervently love one another from the heart.”

Third, “love is something that you do”
• being thoughtful to give gifts to others and to give thoughtful gifts
• being thankful for what someone has done for you
• “express it when you feel it.” (Rob during our discussion of Ch 4)
• “doing” love

Fourth, do not be manipulative in relationships. Allow the other person room to be himself. Let him talk, do not be free with advice, do not dominate the friendship.